Monday, December 31, 2012

Resolution Detective

Now that the holidays are behind us and 2013 is fast approaching, most people are working on (if they haven’t already) their New Year’s Resolutions and/or their goals for the upcoming year.   Resolutions are usually about improving ourselves: losing weight, quitting smoking, exercising more, and reducing stress are a few of these resolutions but what many fail to work on are the shadows that are buried down deep that could possibly be keeping them from reaching their goals.
If you have made your list already, take a look and see if they are the same resolutions that you put on the list for 2012.  Did you put them on the 2013 list because you need to continue to work on the change this next year or did you go back to your old habits so you need to begin working on them again?  If it’s the latter, are there some items that are on your list every year because you give up on them for one reason or another?  If this is the case, there could be some underlying reasons why you aren’t able to make those changes.  These reasons could be an aspect of your shadow self.  Let’s face it, making changes can be extremely difficult.  Habits are hard to break and it takes perseverance and hard work to chip away at those habits in order to make new ones but sometimes the obstacles go deeper. 
If you find yourself constantly trying to make the same changes over and over again without any success, you may want to look at one of your shadows.  The answer could be something that you already know but didn’t really give it a lot of thought or it can be something that escapes you and you have to be your own detective and search for clues.  If, for example, your resolution is to make better food choices and you find yourself reaching for food that has in the past comforted you but is not necessarily healthy, you may need to analyze why you need to be comforted.  Are you eating out of loneliness or sadness?  Maybe you are stressed out?  Instead of eating more healthy options, maybe you reach for something quicker that is not as healthy.  Why are you reaching for the quicker option?  Is your life so hectic that you can’t take time to make better choices?  Why is your life as hectic as it is?  Can you make different choices to create more balance and achieve a more manageable schedule?  Do you thrive in the chaos or does it deplete your energy? These are only the first level of questions that you can ask yourself and those answers can reveal more layers.  These questions can be difficult to face, which is why they are shadows in the first place.  We don’t want to face them so we push them down so deep so that we don’t have to think about them but the problem is that they come out in other behaviors that we don’t expect them to, seemingly having to do with nothing until we start looking at them and peeling back the layers.  If you are not sure what shadow it could be or have no idea where to start looking, meditate on it, journal, or pull a tarot card to give you clues as to what the underlying problem could be. 
Does every failed resolution have an underlying shadow?  Of course not, but if a shadow is the cause, it can be like beating your head against a brick wall until you look the shadow in the face and tell it that you will not allow it to block your progress any longer.  You owe it to yourself to do the detective work and work on every aspect of yourself that you want to improve.  You deserve it.
I wish you all an abundant of blessings for 2013! 
Happy New Year!!